Saturday, January 10, 2009

It's Gonna Be a Long Four Years For Obama

Already getting stiff opposition from fellow Democrats who are none too pleased with his political maneuverings, Obama is going to be in for a long, hard four years. And the fun hasn't even begun yet.

Here is HuffPo, no less, having a go at him...

The Huffington Post

Posted January 8, 2009

By Andy Borowitz

Hoping to calm a nation whose nerves have been rattled by economic woes, President-elect Barack Obama today delivered the first in a series of numbingly boring speeches designed to put the nation to sleep.

Viewers who were able to remain awake for the entirety of his speech could boil down Mr. Obama's economic plan to two points: stimulate the American economy while tranquilizing the American people.

"The President-elect is well aware that Americans are having trouble sleeping," said chief of staff designee Rahm Emanuel. "These speeches are designed to fix that."

By that criterion, Mr. Obama's speech on economic matters today was a huge success, with over half of his audience losing consciousness five minutes in.

"That speech was a home run," Mr. Emanuel said. "If he gives more speeches like that, you can throw away your Ambien."

But even as Mr. Emanuel was touting his boss's sandman-like oratory, Mr. Obama's Surgeon General nominee, Dr. Sanjay Gupta, offered Americans the following warning: "If you are listening to one of President-elect Obama's speeches on the radio, do not attempt to operate heavy machinery."

Andy Borowitz is a comedian and writer whose work appears in The New Yorker and The New York Times, and at his award-winning humor site,


Meanwhile, in Chicago, blagojevich is being offered up as the sacrificial goat (couldn't happen to a nicer guy) by fellow thuggians, who somehow hope to convince the world that with his passing, the phoenix will rise from the ashes, leaving the public with a fresh scent of honest Chicago politics. Uh Huh. Oh, brother.